The start

I have the song from the Sound of Music running through my head, "let's start at the very beginning. A very good place to start." blah blah blah. But it is a start and I'm doing like a turtle, slowly and surely. Waiting for the end of the race, but taking my time. When I'm like the hare I burn out and don't end. When I am a turtle I end it, maybe not as pretty as others but I finish what I start.

This blog is about me. Not my sons. Not my husband, not my job, family, or my animals. They will hold starring roles at different times, but as I journey back to me this blog has to be about me. Maybe I'll have a reader, maybe not. It's not about that, it's about me putting it down and inspiring myself to do better. So here goes.

Tomorrow will be a huge risk, as I post a photo of me. I'm not particularly in "love" with my body right now. Hell let's be honest my body bums me out, but it's mine and I need to take care of it. I have not done it, not just for the past few years, but for many many years. There is no easy solution, although the path to all of this is easy joy now. Tulen principles, acceptance, balance, using R.A.W to connect with my ilmu and spirit. Float. Water. Accept. Joy. Love. Trust. Abundance. Prosperity. Joy. Perhaps I will print and share at my ceremony, perhaps not. Right now my focus is right now. Being in mindfulness and easy joy now. I am. I have.

I might post goals or challenges. I will post my work in my Nia class, simply because even though it's Nia the principles transfer to Tulen. EVERYTHING transfers to tulen. My children are tulen babies, my commitment to my husband was blessed by Tulen. My life is the result of living in alignment. When I am out of alignment, I am out of balance. What my journey of balance/alignment is creating how that looks for me. Not my teammates, not my teachers, not my friends. How I find my own alignment, and what it looks like. How I align my body with my spirit - hmmm I've been working on this since gold sash perhaps this perchobian will answer that. How I align my heart in myself with the heart of my mommy self. Aligning with my children so they grow up knowing that I was there for them, but didn't sacrifice myself for them - self-sacrifice will be the end of being a good mommy. In the end what is is, what is isn't. Lessons learned, relearned, relearned, relearned, reshaped, relearned.

Blessed be. So be it. It is.